Check In On Your Mom Friends
Why do we only check in on mom’s when they first have a baby?
I pretty much knew when I was pregnant that I would suffer from some form of postpartum depression.
Call it mom gut, intuition, or just learning from past experience…I was afraid in the early days of motherhood I would find myself face to face with the demon that is depression. And if you’ve been following me at all, you know I was right.
But I recognized what was going on, got the help I needed, and took care of my health and wellbeing.
Fast forward one year later and there I was. Sitting there wondering what the hell was going on. Why was I feeling like this? Why was I so happy and then so sad? Why was I burnt out even though I was getting more than enough sleep at night? Why was I having these weird thoughts that I still can’t put into words? And the scariest…why was I afraid to be alone?
One night, many months ago, while JJ was fast asleep in his crib, I broke.
I burst into tears and sobbed for what felt like hours . I knew exactly what I was crying about and exactly what I was facing.
I was terrified.
I didn’t know what to expect as my PPD reared it’s ugly head into my life again, and I was scared shitless. I was skeptical to tell people how I was feeling or what I was thinking in fear of judgement. In fear of “but you have nothing to be sad over.” And I didn’t.
But here’s what I’ve learned about our good ol’ friend depression:
We don’t always get to choose when it comes into our lives because we don’t always have control over our life circumstances. Especially as a mom when your life is run by a little human (or an army of little humans).
So when I’ve had a long week with JJ, and I haven’t slept, and I’m working all. the. time. I hit that wall. The wall of “I can’t do it anymore” and “I can’t keep living like this.”
You see, being a mom is one of the hardest jobs out there. And don’t get me wrong; I know I’m lucky as hell that I get to call myself Mom as not all women do.
But that doesn’t take way from the fact that motherhood is H-A-R-D.
No matter how much support you have from your partner or your loved ones or your friends it’s still hard. It’s still exhausting. It still wears you down.
So please, whether you’re a mom yourself or you simply have all the mom friends, please check in on us.
Please pop in to say hi and play with our child so we can shower alone or eat a meal. Please offer to take our child for a quick walk or trip to the park. Please help us find a babysitter so we can have date night or a night out with our girlfriends.
Please don’t stop checking in on us just because we’re past the newborn stage, or we’re not breastfeeding anymore, or our baby is finally sleeping through the night (on occasion).
Always check in on us…trust me, we need as much love as our little humans do.
And momma, if you’re feeling alone or burnt out or wondering why the hell you’re feeling the way you do, I’ve got you. Don’t be scared. Because I promise you, you are not alone! Even if we’re worlds apart, we’re all in this mom thing together.
And there is nothing better than feeling supported during the most unknown journey of your life.
Your Honest Momma xo